"HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!"

Its so busy and noisy in here, everyone is excited, lots of chatter,everyone is ecstatic lots of laughter. The whole room is full of youth and vigor. Everyone is eating, drinking, dancing and getting ready to scream "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!" as in about ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ minute it would be 12am on the first day of January 2011. The year 2010 had lots of things in store and 2011 seemed to have more. And then the count down started "TEN!!!"everyone screamed. Lots of excitement was written on everyone's face. "NINE!!!" they screamed, drinks spilled and the heat was on."EIGHT" they screamed at the prospect of making more money in 2011. "SEVEN!!!" More screams as they made up their minds to all build houses at the end of 2011. "SIX!!!" The excitement was more intense. Hopes of getting married was fired up in the hearts of the ladies. "FIVE!!!" Louder screams with living the fancy life the center of everyone's thoughts. "FOUR!!!" Lots of people were off their seats with their hearts channelled towards getting ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ promotion in 2011. "THREE" now everyone was on their feet, thoughts on meeting that special person come 2011."TWO!!!" Everyone was running around. New year, new level,new car. "ONE!!!" The whole room was almost upside down. Everyone had gone crazy. Thoughts of celebrity status, red carpets, interviews, the paparazzi was everyones dream for 2011.....Annnndddd "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!" Scrrreeeaaammmsss, ssshhhooouutsss, running around,drinks spilling,bottles and glasses shattering. Fireworks, Firecrackers,gunshots. Hugs, handshakes, pecks, kisses. Everyone was so elated, excited, jumpy, happy. Everyone was happy having fun. Tina's resolve was to stop lying in 2011, John's was to stop fornicating keeping himself for marriage, Aisha's was to stop being ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ homewrecker, Chinedu's was to stop internet fraud ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅.K. ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ 'Yahoo Yahoo', while Jumai's was to get close to God. Fast forward to Jan 3rd Tina lied to her mum about going for an all night choir rehearsal but went clubbin, Jan10 was John's best friends birthday bash where he met Abigail and took her home to hit it off all night long, Aisha met Alahaji Danjuma on Jan 15 and made him divorce his wife , Chinedu on the 1st of Feb could not take it anymore and went back to pushing buttons on his Laptop. As at March 1st Jumai had not opened her bible......Fast track to now we've had our Ten to One count down and have screamed "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!" for 2012. We all have our resolutions я we keeping them or breaking them before Jan 31st? Think about that........




N:B drop your New Year resolutions in the comment section.

"28th December is Christmas Day"

"Honk,Honk" was the sound of the horn of the Mollue bus that woke me up this morning. "Oshodi, Oshodi, Oshodi wole with your 200Naira change, i no get change o" were the words of the bus conductor screaming for passangers to get on board his bus. His screams were similar to the cries of agony of ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ woman in labour. "Splash!" was the sound of the dirty water from the pothole on the road falling on my skin when the huge tyres of the bus dived into it."Puf, Puf, Puf" was the sound of smoke coming out of the wide exaust pipe of the bus and heading in my direction. And "Toohoorr" was the sound of my throat about to cough out my lungs after inhaling the smoke. You may ask where am i that all this is happening to me. My name is Chukwudi and i live under Ojuelegba bridge. By this time last year i was in the village where I belong. Going to the farm and helping out my parents in whatever way. I was through with secondary school and that was it about school for me. I was looking for something productive to do with my life. I had my school certificate, i had my muscles, all ‎​i needed was ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ job. Uncle Emeka came home for Christmas alone and when he was going back asked my parents to let me come stay with him in Lagos. I leaped for joy when he told me. I almost ran round the village. The prospect of going to the city (Lagos) made me dance better than King David in the bible. There was no music tho but danced on. My last days in Umuaku village i lived like ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ king. Commanding people around, buying things on credit with the promise to pay in ten folds as i was going to the promise land, the land of opportunities, the land flowing with pounds and dollars. Little did i know one year later, i wud be ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ member of one of the largest community of homeless people in Lagos. We got to Lagos and I met his wife. They were married for two years and had no kids yet. I could swear she winked at me the first time she saw me. Trouble. She bought me lots of stuff and told me not to tell my uncle. I didn't. Next she was making passes at me, rubbing me, begging me to sleep with her. I pushed her to the floor and made her see that i would never betray my Uncle Emeka, only for her to raise an alarm that i was about to rape her. She screamed an tore her clothes to get evidence against me. She brought out all that she bought for me and told my Uncle that I was ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ thief, stealing his money to buy things. Uncle gave me the beating of my life and threw me out. Now I'm on the streets. The cold night has become my airconditioning, torn up indomie carton laid on the tarred road is now my bed. Three days ago was the 25th of December, christmas day they call it but for me, NO. One eats chicken and rice on christmas, one spends time with family, one laughs ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ lot and goes to parties, but all i had was pure water, curses form my housemates, tears of sorrow, and regret. Today is the 28th of december and the sound of ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ mollue bus woke me up. I expected the day to go by just like that but something happened. It was unbelievable. Father christmas happened. ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ man was passing by and dropped 1000naira without even knowing. I pounced on it like ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ mad man. I screamed for joy like ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ barren woman who just did ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ test and realised she was pregnant, like the captain of ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ world cup winning team, like ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ cat who had just been handed ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ rat. Tears filled my eyes. I was actually going to eat chicken and rice. My day was made, my season was made, my christmas is today. "The 28th of December is Christmas day"....

"I'M PARANOID, ITS CHRISTMAS"

This morning i woke up barely sleeping for two hours, i had to watch my back all night as it was necessary, no, mandatory is more like it. Nobody wants to die but everyone wants to go to heaven. The concrete floor seemed ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ bit cold but i didn't mind. It was one of the most deadly times of the year for my species as everyone just wanted ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ piece of us. Our name was everywhere, in everyone's mouth, everyone loved us alive but better off dead. Yes your guess is as good as mine, "I AM ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ CHICKEN, I'M PARANOID, ITS CHRISTMAS". I woke up at the crack of dawn this morning and refused to crow. It didn't make sense to me. How would i tell everyone the time has come when my life would soon be over. How would i say to humanity "its time, i'm here come and get me". I hesitated. I felt if i didn't crow, the day would go by and humanity would wake up on the 26th and my neck would be safe, but i was wrong. I was dead wrong. The sun was coming up when i heard another rooster crow. "Oh My Gosh" i screamed, I'm dead. Why did that stupid old man alert everyone. Now I'm dead, i'm done for, I'm doomed, I'm finished. I went into hiding but it did me no good, these humans were too wise, they just knew how to drive me out of hiding. I tried under the car, he turned on the car and drove out. i tried behind the open door, she closed it revealing my feathery ass. I tried in the dogs cage but ran off when the mean animal charged towards me. My life was coming to an end, i could see it but there was nothing i could do about it. I was running around even when nothing was after me. I was paranoid. The whole world was against me. Me and me alone. The smell of death filled the air and this agitated me the more. And then i felt someone was coming, i slowly crept out of the garage just to come face to face with my oga with ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ knife in his hand. I froze, could this be it, we engaged each other in ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ staring match for what seemed like eternity, i tried scuttering to the right but there was his son, to the left was his other son and then i heard ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ bang behind me. The garage door was shut by his wife. ‎​i was trapped i couldn't move, i was shaking so bad my feathers were plucking themselves out. Could this be it. I tried flying off but was rushed by the three mean looking humans. They caught me, laughter filled the air as they were happy at the prospect of eating my flesh. They celebrated singing christmas songs one after the other. Tears filled my tiny dot eyes at the sight of death. I was being led to the slaughter, to the hole where my blood would be buried. In ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ few seconds it would all be over. My dream to become ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ lawyer advocating for chicken rights to live was over. I had failed in my quest, i had failed destiny...."I Am ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ CHICKEN, I'M DEAD, ITS CHRISTMAS"

Nado Top 10......

Aii right now im going to give all of you a rundown of my top 10 fav tv series.............rundown starts in 10.............9.........8..................7......................6...............5..................4........3.........2.......and here it is








1) the 1st of course is 24.....abeg this Jack Bauer guy is totally crazy......not that I want him dead or something but how come he escapes death all the time.......is he a cat.........




2)my 2nd Is ONE TREE HILL.......loved this series so bad that I was called lucas......yeah......Chad Micheal Murray is really fresh.......really wanted him to get with brooke and everything but things happened and he later went for peyton.......i was concerned so I read it up and realised he was actually married to brooke real life for about 6 months......he cheated(badt guy) and they split and so that they would not clash nd all( not like they didnt) on the show, they made their storylines go seprate ways.......all the same......my second




3) my 3rd is GOSSIP GIRL.........now at a point I started thinking one tree hill had lost its no 2 spot but after much delibration I think this comes in 3rd . When I saw Dan and Serena I knew their love was so much more than just the movie....it turned out I was rite about it......they actually dated and of course like almost all hollywood romances they split.......hated Chuck at first but he later made me like his steez........shhh dont tell anyone but I started talking like him at some point......dont tell......u promised...........




4)in 4th place is desperate housewives.......i really loved this one from the first episode......the twist in the plot and how the story of 5 ladies was told in less than one hour per episode was really fresh.......i was so loving Eva (Gabrielle) and the way she and Carlos always fought and always made up......loved Susan at a point but she is too much of a douche bag to have my heart........of course u have to love the plumber mike and Susan's ex Carl...my mum is stuck up on bree (the neat freak) and u cant get enough of Edie's schemes.......Lynette should calm down and enjoy life a little tho.........trust me this is a must watch...........




5)in 5th place is SUPERNATURAL........initially when I got the cd I had second thoughts but I was later drawn to the suspense and trash talk about the revelations........how hells gate was opened with a colt what the hell........but it is ok tho.....not much to say about it but u would like it........






watch out for my 6 to 10...........let me know what u think........tell everyone.......

"Coming Home"....

I open my eyes to the darkness of my room.everything seems still safe for the periodic spin of the fan above my head.i lay on my 6 by 3 mattress atop my iron bed with my rock stone pillow beneath my head. Yes,rock stone as though wet rags were stuffed inside and this was supposed to be uncomfortable for me but hey,I'm enjoyin it caz I've been accustomed to it. Then 'BAM' it hits me 'I'm going home today'...Four months ago i resumed as a freshman into this university. Had to get accustomed to the rules, eat bad food, cope with characters,engage in unnecessary chatter, laugh over trash talk, all that jazz and four months later after a couple of friends, lots of acquintances,hectic classes,a tanned body, basketball, meeting a girl and examinations, i get to go home for semester break.....i start hearing footsteps on my floor corridor accompanied by croaked singing voices as some of my floor mates carried buckets to go have their baths. The buses are meant to leave by 7am so i get up, pick up my bucket of water,towel,soap dish,toothbrush and paste and head for the bathroom.As i open my door,i get hit by the cold wind which seems like below zero degrees temperature.i race down towards the bathroom and get compensated by the little warmth it provides. I scoop water and pour it over my body,teeth clattering,body shaking, and vibrating moans coming out like the 'MOO's' of ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ cow makes it seem like someone dropped me at the north pole 'naked'....i packed my things two days earlier so all i did coming back from the bathroom was to dress up and get set for the journey.......just as my pal and i step out of the male residential hall, the buses and cars start balling in to take students to their various states of residence. I had been counting down the days and could not believe it was finally here.i was going home. They all park in front of the female residential hall and myself,my pal and other guys take our stuff to where they are parked......it took about two hours to clear people to start going but all that was on my mind was to see 'her'. I start searching for her in the crowd and i don't see her. "She should be here somewhere" i say to myself trying to be positive. I so badly need to say my goodbye properly caz to me, the one i said the night before was not just enough. And there she was,standing on the stairs of the female hostel looking like ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ lost kid on the busy streets of New york.so vunurable, aparently cold, she wore ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ small hooding which obviously did little to give her full warmth.beautiful.yes beautiful she was, as her big white eyes shone from the distance. She hadn't seen me so i took pleasure in assessing her slender features.just like telepathy as i silently called her name,she looked in my direction bringing a sheepish smile to my face....walking up meet her felt like forever.it felt like i was in ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ hollywood movie walking up to her in slow motion with Lionel Richie or Benny Ε̲̣̣̣̥ King playing in the background.finally i got to her and then.....................leaving the school compound gave us the aura of freedom of some sort.myself and 6 of my friends in ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ sienna bus on our way to Lagos. 'ROAD TRIP' it was so much fun. Singing,eating,yabing, watching movies.we knew in ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ few hours we wouldn't be seeing one another for another 10 days so we tried to make the best of it.....getting to Lagos i was the first to drop.it was the first time in four months i would go ‎​​​​A̶̲̥̅ day without seeing my friends. Hugs, pecks, handshakes and countless rounds of "I'll miss U̶̲̥̅̊".the hardest part was to watch the sienna roll away with my friends waving at me and me waving back in turn untill the car was out of sight.turning back i picked my bags and smiled.'Home at last'.

Read this.....

I'm down,depressed,sad,lonely and angry.i feel like committing murder or suicide. One of the two as long as someone goes down. I'm counting down from twenty to avoid beating the living daylight out of someone...... I'm sitting down here trying to calm down Caz I'm pissed.do i know why?(no..maybe..i just don't know)then this dude steps on my shoe. OMG. i see d guy dead already.my fists clenched,teeth gritted but I'm surprised when i hear him apologizing(i thought i gassed him or do the dead talk?)i go somewhere quiet to calm down and think but i get there,I'm calming down but am i thinking?(no..maybe......don't know) I'm trying consciously to think but nothing pops up.then everything turns dark i feel like I'm in space.it takes me a while to realize I'm in my head. And then something moves past me and all I cud make out of it is 'THOUGHTS'.... And then  more appear but as i try to reach for them, they slip away.as i move closer they move farther.they just keep eluding me.I'm literally tripping over them.i feel empty i need to grab 1*screams*.........hope y'all didn't think that was me. a PSYCHO was talking i was just writing it down...........lol

"THOSE DAY'S ARE GONE"

Sit back, relax, close your eyes...Take a trip.... A̶̲̥̅ trip back in time...Way way back in time...When all that was in our minds was for the heavens to open up and pour rain...Heavy rain to wet the hard stony earth and turn the sand to mud, just so we could run out when the rain was gone to make sand castles and mould balls of mud....*(those days are gone)*.....when we just couldn't understand why the grownups could enjoy watching the news when cartoon was on....*(those days are gone)*....when we chased after chickens and when we could not get a hold of them we begged them trying to convince them to come to us with rounds of "Please na".....*(those days are gone)*....when we went to school with lunch boxes and came home without eating the content because we played throughout and forgot to eat....*(those days are gone)*....when we got shy when we saw girls and in one minute became bestfriends with them....*(those days are gone)*....when we cherished #5naira more than #100 naira, u knw what I mean....*(those days are gone)*....when we sang ourselves 2 boredom and cried ourselves 2 sleep....*(those days я gone)*....when we drew ridiculous figures with beans head, stick like bodies, rat like hands and legs with shoes that pointed 2 the extreme right and left(flingstones style) and called them men....*(those days я gone)*....when we sucked the living daylight out of our thumbs, pleasuring ourselves while disgusting our parents who tried 2 no avail 2 get us 2 stop....*(those days я gone)*.... WOW.....can't believe those good old days я gone....the beauty of it all is that, today is the good old day of tomorrow.........NADO...